Tuesday, June 16, 2015
This weekend I had the chance to do some stargazing. It was incredible. As I was staring at the sky, I just couldn't help but think of the fact that God is real. He's real and He loves me. I was reminded of my worth as a daughter of God. Which, was interesting and unexpected, but certainly welcomed.
I've struggled to feel significant at times. And you'd think looking at thousands upon thousands of stars would only add to that. But, it didn't. Somehow it made me feel more significant. I am here. I am part of God's plan. I am loved. He created all these beautiful things and all these beautiful stars, yet He knows me personally and loves me deeply.
President Uchtdorf has said,
"But even though man is nothing, it fills me with wonder and awe to think that “the worth of souls is great in the sight of God.”
And while we may look at the vast expanse of the universe and say, “What is man in comparison to the glory of creation?” God Himself said we are the reason He created the universe! His work and glory—the purpose for this magnificent universe—is to save and exalt mankind.8 In other words, the vast expanse of eternity, the glories and mysteries of infinite space and time are all built for the benefit of ordinary mortals like you and me. Our Heavenly Father created the universe that we might reach our potential as His sons and daughters.
This is a paradox of man: compared to God, man is nothing; yet we are everything to God. While against the backdrop of infinite creation we may appear to be nothing, we have a spark of eternal fire burning within our breast. We have the incomprehensible promise of exaltation—worlds without end—within our grasp. And it is God’s great desire to help us reach it." ("You Matter To Him, Oct. 2011)
I also think of Psalms 8
3 When I consider thy heavens, the work of thy fingers, the moon and the stars, which thou hast ordained;
4 What is man, that thou art mindful of him? and the son of man, that thou visitest him?
5 For thou hast made him a little lower than the angels, and hast crowned him with glory and honour.
There's just no way God isn't real.
Thursday, June 11, 2015
For the past several (and I mean several) months, I've struggled to know the Lord's will for me. The question in my heart and mind has been, "what's next?" And honestly, not much has come at all. I've fasted. I've prayed. I've studied the scriptures. Read my patriarchal blessing. Attended my church meetings and the temple. And still, I feel lost.
Last night as I was on a walk (and took the above picture), pondering life as I often do, the words, "Hold on. The light will come" popped into my head. (Which, funny, they are from a Michael McLean song I've heard like once in my life.) I do know that is true. I have to hold on. The light WILL come. Eventually.
I've learned so much about patience and faith the past few years of my life. It seems once again, that's what I need to do - be patient and have faith. If God made everything easy and gave us all of the answers right away, where would be the growth?
Elder Richard G. Scott said, "This life is an experience in profound trust—trust in Jesus Christ, trust in His teachings, trust in our capacity as led by the Holy Spirit to obey those teachings for happiness now and for a purposeful, supremely happy eternal existence. To trust means to obey willingly without knowing the end from the beginning."
And so, I will wait. I will hold on. I will trust. Because I do know God loves me. He loves me enough to stretch me, to mold me, to make me wait and be patient. One day, the light WILL come. And it will be more beautiful than I could have ever imagined.