In Every Change

I love this time of year. And, when I say I love it, I mean I LOVE it. So. Much! I love the beautiful colors most of all. Although I'm not a fan of cold weather, I do love the crisp, chilly fall air. Change is in the air.

Change can be a beautiful thing. This year has been a year of change for me. I feel like that has been God's lesson for me - learn from change. I'm still working on figuring out what lessons I'm supposed to learn from change. Apparently I'm supposed to learn something because I've felt that every corner I turn this year a new change has appeared! It's been a recurring theme in my life. For the longest time, my life felt stagnant. It felt like nothing was changing and nothing was going to change. Well, turns out, it does happen!

January of this year brought some change right off. At the beginning of the year, the prophet and president of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints passed away. This resulted in a change in leadership.

Shortly thereafter in January, I was offered and accepted a new job. This was such a prayed for and longed for change.

I've already changed desk locations at my work (ok, small thing, but still!). And, over the summer, my boss announced he was asked to head up another department. I was completely devastated over this (truly). I really love my boss. This change has been a long process. They just hired my boss' replacement, who starts at the end of this month. I think Heavenly Father knew I needed months to process this, which has helped.

My church congregation changed from having Sacrament Meeting first, to having it as the last meeting earlier this year. Small thing, but not a huge fan of this change. Hoping it'll change back with the new schedule. Which is another change. Recently, it was announced that church will now be 2 hours instead of 3 (which is a VERY welcomed change!).

Also at church this year, my congregation got a new Bishopric. I also was given a new calling (service assignment), which has been such a great thing for me.

Also this year, I got a new roommate. The person she replaced is one of my very best friends. I was not expecting her to move out. This change was really unexpected and hard for me. It came about the same time I was getting a new boss and new Bishop as well.

All of the above events are things that have happened without me doing a thing. Which, I've been reminded that God is in control. He's over it all.

However, I have been proactive in making intentional changes in a few areas of my life this year, which has been awesome. I started going to the gym in the morning sometimes. That's huge for me. I'm good at working out in the evening, but going in the morning is a huge struggle.

I've also been reading more books. I'm trying to be more productive. I've really enjoyed learning about others' lives by reading biographies and memoirs.

Another recent change I am in the process of making is spending less time on social media. I'm currently participating in a 10-day social media fast. The women of my church were encouraged to do this by the prophet. So far, it has proven to be a great change. When I do return to social media, I plan to spend less time there.

I guess I can sum this all up by saying change can be a beautiful thing. Yes, it can be hard. But, we're meant to learn, grow, and stretch. I have learned that God is always there. I love the lyrics of the hymn, "Be Still My Soul," which say, "Leave to thy God to order and provide; in every change he faithful will remain."

Can't wait to see what amazing changes He has in store for my life in the future!

Waiting for Pearls

Yesterday, I got a real pearl here in Hawaii, straight from the oyster. Some sales guy lured me in with a good deal. :) I picked the oyster and watched him open it and take the pearl out. He told me it probably took about 4 years for that pearl to form.

When I got back to where we’re staying, I did some research on pearls. I learned that pearls form when an irritant enters the oyster. Pearls develop “nacre,” or luster.  The longer they are in the shell, the more beautiful the nacre. Couldn’t help but think of the profound symbolism of this all.  

Sometimes we’re in a “shell,” and God keeps putting irritants in our lives (trials). But the longer we have to wait, the more beautiful we will be. This year has been all about that. I had to wait a few years for a certain blessing in my life and there were many irritants the past few years, but God has blessed me with something so beautiful. I feel like he has blessed me with so many pearls this year. I hope that I have more nacre/luster because of the irritants that have helped me develop. 

Warmer Days Ahead

It snowed a ton here last night and this morning. It's March 4th and I am REALLY ready for spring. Nothing makes me question my life choices (of moving back to Utah) like snow in March. (Just kidding, snow in May does. ;) )

A phrase has repeatedly come to mind recently. It's this: 

"...winter will surely give way to the warmth and hope of a new spring." (Dieter F. Uchtdorf)

I'm really grateful for that truth. No matter how long the cold, dark, bitter, winter - spring WILL come. No matter how many crazy bitter storms, warmer days ARE ahead. It's a truth we know. We know spring will come after winter. 

I've thought about this truth in life. I've experienced it. Some seasons last longer than others. My "winter" of job hunting lasted three years. There were some bitter, cold, dark days during those years. But deep down, I did know that spring comes after winter. I knew my winter would end. I knew (and still know) that the sun always comes out. (Read this post here.)

And, even in the midst of cold winters, we can find beauty. As much as I really dislike winter, I love the glistening snow on the trees. It's beautiful. We can find beauty in the "winters" of our lives. 

After winter comes new life. Things come alive again. There's so much hope in this knowledge. As cheesy as it is, after job hunting for three years and now having a new job, I feel alive again. I feel like a new person. 

Spring is symbolic of rebirth and renewal - specifically our Savior. I'm grateful for Him who is the hope of all things. Because of Him the winters of our lives WILL end and warmer days are ahead. If you are struggling, I can promise you that things will get better. 

"...bad days come to an end, that faith always triumphs, and that heavenly promises are always kept." (Jeffrey R. Holland)

In God's Time

"To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven." (Ecc. 3:1)

Tonight as I was cleaning out some papers, I came across a folder with a job description in it. Now, over the past three years I have printed out A LOT of job descriptions in preparation for interviews I've had. This one, though, is particularly special. It's for a job I interviewed for a year ago. 

The job was for an opening with Deseret Digital Media. I had two interviews. I felt really good about it. I really thought I was going to get the job. But, I was crushed when I learned that they had given it to an internal candidate. I moved on, but honestly, that job was still in the back of my mind. 

Fast forward to this past December. I saw the job posted again. I was so excited! I was determined. I wanted that job! I had my roommate forward my resume on to someone who knew someone. Within a few days, as I was sitting at work, I got a text from the person I had interviewed with a year ago. He wanted to talk to me right then. Ahh! I went out to my car and we had a good phone chat. He remembered me. 

I had a couple of in person interviews after that. There was some time in between all of these and it was KILLING me. I prayed SO hard for this job. I had an ARMY of people praying for me, too. One day before one of the interviews, as I was sitting at my desk, I had the thought - "bring donuts to the interview." It was the funniest thing. But, I totally did it. And the team I interviewed with loved it. So, when I say I did all I possibly could to get this job - I really mean it. 

The night before I was to find out if I got the job, I struggled. I was so done. I just felt like I couldn't do it any more. I couldn't handle one more rejection and one more day at my current job. I received a priesthood blessing that night and that brought me a ton of peace. 

The next day I got the amazing news that I got the job. It is such an incredible blessing for which I am so, so grateful. 

The past three years have been very challenging. I was prompted to move back to Utah and I guess I thought things would just fall into place. But, they didn't. But, I remember when I felt prompted to move back, I had the thought that it was so I could "grow." I must say, I have definitely grown. 

God has His time. Rejection and after rejection, I wondered what was wrong with me. I wondered why I stunk at interviews. But, honestly, somewhere in the middle of my job hunt, I really felt that it wasn't me - it was God's time. I do know that's true. When we do the very best we can, He makes up the difference and He makes things happen in His time. 

A few years ago as I was driving home from work in Arizona, I heard a song that I've come to love - "In God's Time," by Randy Houser (go look it up). Some of the lyrics I love: 

Oh, but no one knows
Not you or me
It might be tomorrow or it might never be
Oh, but don't lose faith
Put it in His hands
'Cause it might be that He might have a bigger plan
Than you had in mind
Miracles happen
In God's time

Miracles DO happen in God's time. For whatever reason, this job wasn't right a year ago, but now it is. I SO look forward to the future. There is happiness ahead. 

There are a lot of things I don't know. But, I do know God is real. He's there. He cares. He wants to bless us. Sometimes He makes us wait A LONG time (I'm still still waiting on that certain blessing ;)

...). But there's so much learning and growth that comes from waiting. 

I'm extremely grateful to all of the people who reached out to me in kindness during my trial of job hunting. It has been so humbling. It has made me want to be kinder and more thoughtful. And, I truly believe (and hope) that one day I'll use this experience and what I've learned to help others. 

God is good. The best is yet to come.